


Carpet & Drapes

by Battlefox



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: F/M, Lemon, M/M, Multi, Shameless Smut, Smut, Teasing, Threesome, Threesome - F/M/M, Undressing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-18
Updated: 2019-03-18
Packaged: 2019-11-23 23:17:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18158342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Battlefox/pseuds/Battlefox
Summary: The twins seek to answer the question we all have about Mr. De Rolo-Does the carpet match the drapes?





	Carpet & Drapes

It was only the briefest glimpse, but it still caught the attention of both of the twins. Percy, settling back onto his feet after having stretched to snatch a book from the top shelf, frowned at the two sets of eyes that were currently turned towards him.

“What?” He asked defensively, eyeing the twins as they lounged on the desk of the study. Vax was leaning back in the chair, arms casually crossed, while Vex sat on top of the desk itself.

“Your shirt came untucked,” Vex replied casually, her amused smirk not easing Percy’s fears in the slightest. He glanced down, and finding her statement to be accurate, hurriedly shoved the front of his button-down shirt back into the top hem of his pants. Percy looked back up, and finding the twins still watching, huffed indignantly.

“It’s fixed, you don’t need to keep looking.”

“I can’t help it, I’m curious now…” Vax chuckled a little bit, “It lifted just enough… well really, I need to know. Does the carpet match the drapes?”

“P-Pardon—“

“You know what we mean, dear,” Vex straightened, stepping closer to Percy with a gleam in her eyes, “I’d always assumed it was all white down there as well. But what little bit we saw seemed a bit darker.”

“I’d always guessed it was sort of salt-and-pepper,” Vax shrugged, watching Percy stammer and gape, “Or perhaps half-and-half.”

“You should let us… take a look,” Vex said, stepping up to him, then around him. She wrapped her arms around his waist and leaned up, whispering, her lips ghosting over the skin of his ear, “Just a bit of inspecting. Won’t go any further than you want us to.”

“M-Must we do this in the library?” Percy asked weakly. He didn’t  _ really _ wish to protest, but he felt the need to defend himself at least a little bit.

“Oh, we won’t make a mess,” Vax promised, getting up out of the chair, moving up to Percy. He got so close that their bodies were pressing together. Vax reached up and ran a trailing hand down Percy’s chest. “…The real question is will you last long enough for us to take off all of these layers?”

Percy’s lips parted to let out another weak protest, but the only sound that came was a soft gasp as he felt Vex’halia’s teeth nip his neck gently, just above his collar.

“Mmm… you’re already without your coat, at least,” Vex purred, and Percy was able to feel the smirk on her lips against his skin, “One less layer for us to worry about.”

“You both are- h—ahh—“ He was interrupted as Vax’s hand moved lower and grabbed him by the front of the pants, sending a jolt of sensation up his spine.

“What was that, darling?~” Vex asked plaintively, her hands sliding to the buttons of his vest, undoing them at an achingly slow pace.

“You’re both evil,” he murmured, closing his eyes, feeling his heart thump in his throat while the twin’s heady scent surrounded him. 

“Just say the word if you need us to stop,” Vax said evenly, leaning in to kiss the rough skin at Percy’s jawline. Percy felt his spectacles carefully lifted away and set to the side. He lifted his hands, trying to help with the buttons of his vest, but they were halted before they could lift any higher than his belt.   
“Ah ah ah,” Vex’s sultry voice whispered into his hear, “Don’t be naughty. Stay still until we’re done.”

“Yes ma’am.” He barely managed to reply. It was hard to focus on the right words to say while Vax was slowly tugging his shirt free from his pants once more- his long fingers trailing repeatedly along the section of his abdomen just below the navel. It was maddening.

Vex finally unbuttoned the last portion of the vest, and slowly dragged it back over his shoulders and down his arms before carefully setting it aside.

“One,” Vex had to bite her lip to keep from grinning at the quickly devolving state of the tall man in front of her, “My, my, you’re already so worked up, darling.”

“Maybe if you two focused more on buttons, and less on  _ talking-” _ Percy was cut off by a groan as Vex’s hands moved around him, slipping under the buckle of his belt, and just gently brushing him.

“The more you protest, the slower we go,” Vex’s teeth bit down gently on the lobe of his ear, “So, if you don’t want to end up making a mess of your smallclothes, I’d suggest you keep quiet, dear.”

Percy barely bit back another protest, instead rolling his neck back a little, trying to clear his head. He barely managed to get ahold of himself again while the twins focused on the buttons of his shirt and the buckle of his belt, but then found himself buckling slightly at the knees as Vax grabbed his crotch again. 

“Tsk, you really are raring to go, Freddy,” Vax squeezed a bit, eliciting a gasp from Percy, “Wearing such tight pants doesn’t really help hide when you’re feeling frisky, does it?”

Percy didn’t say anything, though he wanted to, and Vax chuckled, rewarding his silence by skillfully moving his thumb along the visible arousal that was straining against the fabric. Percy couldn’t keep from moaning faintly then, bucking his hips against Vax’s hand reflexively. 

“You’re still so wonderfully sensitive,” Vex laughed a little, finishing her unbuttoning of his shirt now. She pulled it down his arms, slowly, as she had the vest, then carefully set it aside as well. Percy tried not to reel from the overwhelming sensations as the twins alternated between kissing and nipping along his bare back and chest.

“Well, we’ve seen the chest before…” Vax mused, running his fingers through the hair there, “Salt and pepper here…” his hand kept moving down, pausing only on the trail of hair that led further down beneath the clothes that still had yet to be removed, “…But it’s slowly getting darker the further down we go.”

“Nnghh….  _ Please _ ,” Percy rasped, then groaned and bucked his hips again as Vex’s hand slipped beneath his pants and grasped him there, working back and forth for a moment before sliding back out again.   
“I thought we said the more you talk the slower we go,” Vex commented, drawing his belt free from the loops of his pants, taking what felt like twenty minutes to do so.

“You do think you can last that long, right?” Vax teased, his fingers undoing a single button on Percy’s pants before returning to their work below that. One by one the twins undid the buttons on the front of his pants, and Percy found himself cursing his over-tailored wardrobe choices. By the time Vax finally slid the pants down to Percy’s knees, he found himself nearly unable to stand, his thighs were shaking so much under the twin’s work.

“Hmm…. All dark hair here, apparently,” Vax finally mused, slipping down the top layer of Percy’s smallclothes, “That settles that.”

“L-Lovely, now can you—a-ahh!!” Percy cried out, throwing his head back as Vax’s mouth slipped around him. He could feel Vax’s tongue moving up and down his length, and he couldn’t keep himself from thrusting his hips forward into it, losing his thoughts in the feeling of it all. Vex’s strong arms supported him from behind, keeping him from falling backwards while Vax started making quick work of him from the front.

Barely moments later, Percy found himself reaching the breaking point, and he cried out again, his knees buckling as he grabbed Vax by the back of the head, twisting his fingers into the man’s long black hair. Vax took everything, keeping Percy going for a moment longer by working his mouth around Percy as he unloaded. Then he pulled back, swallowing and wiping his mouth before panting a bit, and grinning up at Percival. Percy was being set back onto his feet by Vex’halia, though he still held to her for support.

“I-I stand by my previous statement,” Percival gasped a bit, shakily grabbing for his glasses, “Y-you both are evil.”

“If you think that was evil, you hardly know us,” Vex purred, tugging him along with her towards the door, “Let’s head back to the room if you  _ really  _ want to see the evil stuff.”

**Author's Note:**

> Shamelessly wrote this at work. They don't suspect a thing.


End file.
